І. To know, to be able to do EVERYTHING

1. To know all the world’s written legislation – from ancient times to the present day, including the practice of its application and the instructions of the relevant authorities;
2. To know the rules and customary practice of all world trade – from the South Pole to the North Pole inclusive;
3. To know all living and dead languages, including those of the still undiscovered tribes – spoken and written;
4. To know all available and forgotten human knowledge – science, technology and so on;
5. To know everything about everyone and everything;
6. To be able to do anything;
7. To be able to do everything even by himself, and without machines, tools, equipment, knives and the like;
8. To even be able to keep double-sided accounting according to the law and standards;
9. To do everything he knows and can for the pleasure and benefit of the CLIENT.

ІІ. To be a MEDIUM and a CLEAR SEER

1. To be a medium – to keep in touch with the beyond for the purpose of receiving advice and guidance, to do everything in Section I better;
2. To be a clairvoyant – to guess when and what changes in legislation, world trade and business conditions, and generally everything under Section I, will occur in the next 5 years. To predict the CLIENT’s thoughts and desires even before they arise and take shape in his/the CLIENT’s head.

ІІІ. To be DEVOTED and DEDICATED

1. To be devoted and faithful only to the CLIENT;
2. To remember and never forget that the CUSTOMER always has a right even when he has no right. Also, the CLIENT has the right even when breaking the laws;
3. To be available to the CLIENT – 25 hours a day, 8 days a week, 418 days a year;
4. If he becomes ill or dies, to provide the CLIENT with an equal substitute or even better.
5. Honestly, on time and without documents, to pay the CLIENT the amount necessary for the high honor rendered to the accountant – to exercise his profession, and the same amount is regularly indexed according to inflation and so on;
6. To be self-sacrificing – if necessary or even at the hint of necessity, to immediately offer the CLIENT free of charge all his personal and family property, as well as the property of his relatives up to the ninth knee, as well as his relatives and friends. And if he has to even steal.

ІV. To be RESPONSIBLE

1. To be responsible for all business failures, bad karma or karma of the CUSTOMER;
2. To be responsible for floods, volcanic eruptions, earthquakes and the like;
3. To be responsible for rising oil prices, falling stock prices and in general for all financial or economic catastrophes and unfavorable conjuncture;
4. To answer the telephone and the calls of the CLIENT;
5. And if he is called by the Lord to present himself to Saint Peter, he should first coordinate this circumstance with the CLIENT;
6. The accountant IS NOT responsible for the success of the CLIENT.